Wednesday, March 7, 2012

15 ways to have sex

Does having an active sex life help when writing romance?
I can’t speak for anyone else but myself, but I am hoping some of you will share your take on it. I’ve been married for 26 years and our sex life is anything but dull. People always ask how much of my personal life is in my books. I rarely ever tell them about the romantic or sexual aspect of my life, but there have been a few personal encounters that have made it to my books. I think having a wonderful partner helps me to write great sexual encounters between my characters. Having an active imagination helps too. I’m not saying everyone one of the sex scenes in my books are from personal experience. But I do think about how I feel when I’m with my hubby when I write.
As a writer of romance or erotic romance, you need to think outside the box and go beyond the touching and feeling in the bedroom. Sometimes even stepping outside your comfort zone. The readers want to experience something they may not necessarily try themselves, something they may fantasize about. Meeting your lover in a dark alley. Engaging in intercourse against a building wall while people walk past the alley. Being touched under the table at a busy restaurant. In a pool. Fondling in a hot tub with others right next to you. These sort of things draw in the reader. Some may have experienced it and know what the couple is feeling, and some may imagine themselves in that position and wondering what it would feel like.

Having explored some unusual places to engage in sex plays well for writing. Never did I think in a million years that anything my hubby and I did in or out of our bedroom would become a part in my book. Stranger things have happened. It seemed so much easier to explore our kinky sexual side when our children were younger. They were innocent and didn’t understand why mommy and daddy were both in the shower at one time. Or why we took “naps” in the middle of the day. How come mommy and daddy go for so many car rides at night or why mommy and daddy enjoy cleaning out the garage. But the older they get, the smarter they are.

Those quickies in the bathroom, or under the blanket lying out on the grass while watching the stars become evident to them. No more “naps” in the afternoon while the kids watch TV. Nope, we mention lying down and they snicker. Oy! Why the toilet is broken after we both come out of it is not so easily explained away. Doing it in interesting and often unusual places was fun when we were younger. It was a thrill to think we might get caught making out in a park at night. Not so thrilling to be caught by your grown children.

But we still manage to do things out of the norm and keep our sex life active. Anyone reading my books would know that. ;)

So I wonder. Are other writers using personal experience when it comes to love making in their books as well? I can’t be alone in this.

Now, I’m going to share some unusual and interesting places to have sex. Some come from experience, some don’t. I’m not embarrassed to say I’ve done some kinky stuff. Are you?
1: In the shower.
2: In the car
3: On the hood of a car
4: In a bedroom you share with someone else, doing it while they are asleep.
5: On a hill
6: On a pool table
7: In a pool
8: On top of a washer or dryer while its running.
9: In an airplane
10: In a hot tub
11: In the bathtub
12: In a treehouse
13: In a closet at a party
14: In a theatre
15: On the stairs
Your turn. Know of any interesting places to have sex? If you’re an author, do you write sex scenes from experience. One commenter will win a copy of the first book in my passion series. Discovery in Passion.

11 comments:

Kate Richards said...

Oh... so many fine choices. In the bathroom at work while everyone else is there...then have to figure out how to get out without everyone knowing...in a boat pulled up on the beach under a tarp...on a...well I thought it was...deserted beach

Shiela Stewart said...

LOL Kate. But I bet it made the experience all the more exciting after you found out it wasn’t deserted?
Great ideas! I love the work bathroom idea!
Thanks for popping in!

LKF said...

Your list is hard to top but here's one. On a boat in heavy fog, thinking your in the middle of the lake, but to find out your about 10 feet from shore with your family anxiously waiting there for your safe return. It was too funny even then.
Lynda

Shiela Stewart said...

OMG Lynda! That is too funny.

Fierce Dolan said...

Well said! I raised similar points recently: http://www.fiercedolan.com/blog/2012/02/08/squicks-breaking-points-and-boundaries/

Barb Babbage w/a B.J. Scott said...

Hot stuff and lots to think about...after we take a cold shower lol

juliet chastain said...

Impressive list. I'll add my two failed attempts

It was in the elegant elevator in the National Gallery of Art in Washington D.C. Well, that is, we tried, but just as we were about to--the elevator would stop and someone would get on.

Then one dark night on a lounge chair on a deserted beach in the Caribbean...The man who appeared from nowhere wished us a cheerful "good evening."

Becky Moore said...

In full evening wear at a Neil Simon theatre premiere, in the bathroom. Sigh.

Dating in college and vacationing at the beach with his family and no privacy, and breaking into the empty duplex next door for a quickie. Double sigh.

PS. It's too much of a pain in the ass to do anything quick or flexible in evening attire. Lesson learned.

Shiela Stewart said...

Hi Fierce! I'll have to check it out.

You and me both, Barb. I was a little steamed up after researching. LOL

That is priceless Juliet, though I'm sure you didn't think so at the time. Should have pressed the emergancy button and had the car stopped. That way you would have a few moments to get it on. :)And at least the gentleman was kind enough to wish you a good day rather than chase you off. :)

Wow, Becky! You've had some excitment in your life. I don't imagine having a quickie while wearing formal wear is fun, but at least you tried. :)

Thanks everyone for popping in.

Shiela Stewart said...

I've chosen a winner from Wednesdays contest and he lucky commentor is.....

juliet chastain!

Congrats Juliet!

Janice Seagraves said...

I did stairs too.

Janice~